


Take this pocket of time to ourselves

by judyannhale



Category: Big Little Lies (TV), Big Little Lies - Liane Moriarty, The Undoing, The Undoing (TV)
Genre: F/F, First Meeting, idk just go with me, in new york, lawyering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-10
Updated: 2020-12-10
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:22:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27997449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/judyannhale/pseuds/judyannhale
Summary: Besides, what could this woman do? They'd never see each other again.
Relationships: Sylvia Steineitz/Celeste Wright
Comments: 3
Kudos: 18





	Take this pocket of time to ourselves

**Author's Note:**

> ik this is a random pairing but I saw them both wearing the same clothes on twitter and uhhh this happened...
> 
> (tw discussion of domestic violence for Celeste)
> 
> hope y'all enjoy :)

If she hadn't worn that light tan coat to the meeting it might never have happened. 

When they checked the labels, they weren't actually the same - Celeste's was a few years older - but with their matching beige blouses and black pants the similarity was still striking. The only obvious difference was the shoes - Sylvia’s heels were higher, though she still stood a little shorter than Celeste.

If it had been anyone else showing up in the same outfit as Sylvia, it wouldn’t have happened either. She had an instinct to stay defensive, to protect herself, especially at work. But the glare she shot in Celeste’s direction was only met with an apologetic expression. She seemed embarrassed.

“This is what happens when you girls get too involved at work. Run out of time for shopping?” Sylvia’s client laughed at his own joke as he sat down, apparently delighted that he’d noticed they were wearing the same outfit.

Celeste looked startled. Sylvia caught her eye, gave her an _I have to deal with this every day_ kind of look. Celeste smiled. She knew the type. He was the worst kind of asshole - the kind you still had to listen to because somewhere along the line he’d got an important job and enough money to do exactly as he pleased. 

The meeting dragged on for hours, feeling like they were just going around in circles, and Sylvia found herself losing focus far too often. She was getting _distracted_ by this woman in the same outfit as her - this flustered woman who wouldn’t let Sylvia dislike her, who was so quietly professional but communicated in little smiles and rolled eyes from across the table that felt like they were just for her. 

Once it was over, she caught up with Celeste outside. 

“Well, that was painful,” she muttered, just out of her client’s earshot.

Celeste let out a laugh. They both knew it could have been settled in half the time if it had just been the two of them, allowed to do their jobs without constant interruptions and unreasonable demands.

“It’s what happens when men get too involved at work.”

“Exactly,” Sylvia smiled. She hadn’t expected her to be funny. 

She grabbed Celeste’s arm gently. Celeste managed to hide her instinct to flinch away, reminding herself again that she didn’t need it here.

“Hey, I need a drink after today. You free tonight?”

She looked back with an expression that was already becoming familiar to Sylvia - that sweet, flustered surprise. “Oh, yes. Okay.”

Celeste didn't know why she agreed to come. She hated bars, especially ones where she didn't know anyone that well. Especially crowded, noisy ones in New York. She was tired, and overly conscious of her too-formal clothes. But Sylvia's eyes had lit up as soon as she saw her, and they talked to each other so easily - about their kids, their work, anything else they could think of. Celeste didn't have many people she could talk to without worrying what she was going to say next.

“Fuck, d’you get in a fight?” Sylvia grinned. They hadn’t known each other very long, but the idea of Celeste in a fight was already funny to her.

“Hmm?”

Celeste looked down and panicked. She’d left her sleeves rolled up at her elbows. _Stupid of her_. She would have remembered if she hadn’t been drinking, if the music weren’t just a little too loud and her coat uncomfortably warm enough to justify awkwardly standing up from her barstool to take it off. Half her forearm was scattered with murky green and brown bruises, the foundation she’d put on that morning doing an especially feeble job at hiding them now.

She went to roll down her sleeve, but a soft hand stopped her.

“What happened?” Sylvia’s fingers grazed over olive patches.

“Oh.” Celeste didn’t let her voice falter. It was nothing, really. “My boys were fighting. I had to break them up,” she lied without a second thought. 

Sylvia's eyes narrowed. “You know, for such a good lawyer you're a shitty liar.”

Celeste raised an eyebrow. “You think I'm a good lawyer?”

“Mostly a shitty liar,” Sylvia conceded.

Celeste let out a laugh. “I'm not.”

Sylvia nodded. “Mmm. You're too smooth, like you've been practicing it.”

Celeste could feel her cheeks flushing, and then her neck too.

“So, what really happened?”

Celeste stared straight into her eyes, suddenly struck with a strange desire to tell Sylvia everything. She wondered what would happen if she did, if she gave into her impulse just this once. It was all on the tip of her tongue. Besides, what could this woman do? They'd never see each other again. 

She checked over her shoulder - the music was loud enough, and anyone close by was engaged in their own conversations.

“My husband grabbed me by the arm.” She said it matter-of-factly, not quite meeting Sylvia's eye.

“On purpose?” she asked, confused. 

“He was upset I had to travel for work,” she explained.

Sylvia’s brow furrowed. “So he grabbed you?”

Celeste nodded quickly.

They were silent for a few moments, and then Sylvia understood what Celeste was saying - then it dawned on her in a horrible wave that rippled right through her stomach.

“He's done it before.” It wasn't a question. She didn't need to ask.

Celeste nodded again, still staring at her lap.

“Fucking asshole.”

Celeste looked up, and the ghost of a smile crossed her face. Her insides were burning and about to overflow, just from having said the words out loud. What she'd said hung in the air between them, but it wasn't heavy like she'd imagined. It was light - so incredibly light, and blindingly free.

“Are you going to leave him?”

This time Celeste didn't bother trying to lie. “No.”

“Well.” Sylvia felt well and truly stumped. It was rare that she didn’t know what to say, and she didn’t like it. “Are you sure? Do you need help?”

“No.” Celeste’s whole sense of flustered panic had lifted. This was the most sure of herself she’d sounded in years.

Perhaps Sylvia had absorbed all that tension instead. She opened her mouth to speak and stopped herself a few times before landing on “Well, I can't pretend to know what I'm supposed to do in this kind of situation.”

Celeste smiled. “Me neither.”

“D’you wanna get out of here?”

Celeste nodded gratefully, still eager to escape the bar.

“Let’s go back to mine,” she said, gathering up her coat and purse. “We can have a proper drink.”

Once they were out on the street, Sylvia tried to hail a cab. She cursed as it drove straight past her.

“How far is it?” asked Celeste.

“I'm up on 88th.”

“Could we walk it?” she suggested. “I mean, if you don't mind.”

Sylvia looked surprised. “Um, yeah. Sure.” She started down the street, heading North, and Celeste followed.

“Sorry. No one walks anywhere in California.”

“No, it's fine.” She wrapped her coat tighter around her now they were outside. “It's nice.”

Celeste's smile met hers. “Sometimes I think it's the only good part of this city.”

It took Sylvia a good deal of effort to withhold her judgement - she'd dreamed of living in New York since she was a little girl and would sing this city's praises forever. But she forced herself not to dwell on Celeste’s poor taste in cities. As it turned out, she was right. It was nicer to walk.

“You know, you remind me of someone else I know,” Sylvia said into the night air.

“Really?”

“Mmm,” she nodded. “You’re tall, you’re rich, you like walking. And you’re quiet, but you can tell exactly what you’re thinking from your face.”

Celeste didn't know what to make of that. She caught Sylvia’s eye for what she thought might’ve been a moment of real understanding, but then she looked away. “I'm only rich because of my husband.”

“She's only rich because of her dad.”

“Oh?”

“Well, she’s a successful psychologist, too,” Sylvia admitted. “And you’re a successful lawyer.”

“I’m only just starting again,” she said.

Sylvia shrugged. “You’re good, though. You were almost keeping up with me.”

Celeste snorted, nudging Sylvia with her elbow as they walked.

“Mmm. That’s why you got the settlement you wanted,” she replied with a sarcastic edge to her voice that she hadn’t heard in a long time. She worried she’d said the wrong thing, but Sylvia grinned.

“No, that’s cause I was working for Albert fucking Einstein,” she added, because maybe she needed just a little reassurance that the loss hadn’t actually been her fault. And because she’d figured out by now how to make Celeste laugh and she’d be lying if she said she didn’t like it.

“God, some of the nonsense coming out of his mouth,” Celeste agreed. 

“I have to deal with him all week.” Sylvia groaned. “I don’t want to talk about him.”

“What do you want to talk about?”

“I don’t know. _Anything_ else.”

Celeste paused, and they walked in comfortable silence just for a moment.

“You remind me of someone I know, too. Back home.”

Sylvia looked a little taken aback. It was the first time Celeste had seen her falter in conversation.

“How so?”

Celeste shrugged. “You seem like the kind of person who knows everything about everyone.”

A smile crossed Sylvia’s face. She couldn’t help being a little flattered by that.

“Does she know everything about you?”

Celeste knew what she meant immediately. “No.”

“Of course,” she smiled knowingly. “If she knew you wouldn't still be with him.”

“I probably wouldn't,” Celeste admitted.

Sylvia reached for her arm as if to get her attention and comfort her all at once. “You should tell someone at home.”

“I know.” Celeste sighed and kept walking.

“Why haven't you?”

She paused to consider that. She thought about what Madeline would do if she ever did tell her - it scared her to think how that would go, how she would even begin. And she thought about her boys, the way they laughed when Perry scooped them up, one under each arm. And the way his eyes burned straight through to her soul like he'd never seen a more beautiful woman in the world, and the way she still wanted to spend every day stealing glances at him from across the room.

She shrugged. “Because then I'd have to leave him.”

“Well, yes, that's the idea.” Sylvia's expression felt so disapproving. Celeste knew this was what no one else would understand - the way she didn't want to leave. She wouldn’t handle it being over any better than what was happening now.

“Don't you think there could be more out there for you than this?” she asked, her thumb grazing her coat where she knew bruises were hidden underneath. “For your boys?”

“My boys don't know anything about it,” said Celeste, snatching her arm back into her chest. “And I'm fine.”

Sylvia just raised her eyebrows. 

“He loves me and I love him,” she said more forcefully. “We're fine.”

“That's a funny kind of love.”

“Yes, it probably is. But that doesn't change the fact that it _is_ love.”

Sylvia came to a stop outside her apartment building, pulling Celeste closer to her. “You know, Celeste, there are people out there who will think you're incredible, and beautiful, and smart, and want to spend every day of their life just talking to you, and they won’t ever hurt you. Not like that.”

Celeste sighed and looked away. Sylvia didn't understand. “How would you know that?”

Sylvia just smiled, almost in disbelief, looked right into her eyes. “I know, okay?” 

She brushed a strand of golden red hair behind Celeste's ear. Her eyes were just a little wider than usual, hanging off Sylvia’s every word, wondering if she could really trust what she was hearing. Then she remembered herself.

“You've known me for all of-” She glanced down at her phone. “Eleven hours.”

Sylvia laughed. “I know. And I feel like I'm going fucking insane, but look at you. Look how much you've got inside you.” Celeste’s breath hitched at the back of her throat. “At the very least, you're worth about a million times better than him.”

Celeste didn’t know what to say to that. Sylvia felt bad almost immediately, for being so forward, for putting Celeste in a position like that and making her feel awkward. She’d hate it, she thought, if that were her. Except she didn’t know how she’d feel, because she couldn’t even begin to imagine herself in Celeste’s shoes - not really.

“D’you want to come in?” Sylvia gestured back at her apartment building 

Celeste shook her head. “I shouldn’t. It’s late.”

“I spend my whole life doing things I shouldn’t.” Her grin was beautifully wicked. Celeste laughed, but only for a moment.

“I don’t,” she said. “I’m sorry. I’ve got meetings tomorrow.”

Sylvia nodded. “How long are you in New York?”

“I fly back tomorrow night.”

Suddenly the moment felt a lot heavier. She looked at Celeste, feeling like she had far too much to say than she could ever properly articulate. “I guess this is it, then.” It seemed like the kind of moment to launch into some grand speech, but there was nothing. “Thanks for keeping me company.”

Celeste smiled. “Thank _you_ ,” she said. “I’m glad I met you.”

“Me too.” Sylvia took Celeste’s hand in both of hers. “Take care of yourself, okay?” she said, her expression serious. Celeste nodded. She understood what Sylvia meant.

“If you need anything, give me a call,” she continued. “And if you’re in New York again, you owe me a drink.”

Sylvia couldn’t silence the voice in her head telling her - screaming for her to do _something_ , but it was already too late. There was nothing to do.

Celeste smiled, but it was weaker now. Her real life was already setting back in. 

Once they’d said goodnight, she stayed and watched until she got in the elevator and finally vanished from sight. She thought maybe if Sylvia had turned around, and looked back at her, she might have given in and followed her up, stayed for that drink just for the chance to talk a little longer. But Sylvia wasn’t the kind of person to look back.

Instead, Celeste just stood there waiting as this incredible stranger, who knew her better in some ways than anyone else in the world, slipped back out of her life just as quickly as she’d wandered in.


End file.
